Zara Hanawalt

Guest Overview

Episode Summary

Parenting is never quite what you expect—and for Zara Hanawalt, the road to motherhood was filled with unexpected challenges and revelations. As a freelance journalist specializing in parenting, women’s health, and culture, Zara has spent nearly a decade covering the shifting landscape of modern-day motherhood. She’s written for Vogue, Parents, Shape, Glamour, The Everymom, and many others—starting long before she even became a mom herself.

But despite all her research, nothing truly prepared her for her own parenting journey. After struggling with infertility, experiencing a miscarriage, and ultimately conceiving her twins via IUI, Zara faced a difficult pregnancy, unexpected postpartum struggles, and the harsh realities of motherhood in America. In this episode, she opens up about the mental overload of parenting, the impossible expectations placed on moms, and why she believes the system—not mothers—is failing us.

We also dig into how societal views on parenting have evolved over the years, why American motherhood feels so much harder than it should, and what we can do to shift the conversation. Whether you’re a mom in the trenches or just fascinated by the culture of parenthood, this episode is full of real talk, deep insights, and raw honesty.

Fun Fact

I always had a strange hunch I’d end up with twins—even though they don’t run in my family! Sure enough, thanks to fertility treatments, that gut feeling came true.

What do you wish you knew before having kids? 

I wish I had known that I would feel both incredibly lonely and yet desperate for alone time—all at once. Parenting can be deeply isolating, even if you're surrounded by people. Also, no one truly knows what they're doing, no matter how much research they’ve done.

What advice do you give your expectant friends? 

Take an entire day just for yourself before your baby arrives. No errands, no appointments—just be with yourself. The version of you that exists now will never fully be the same, and it’s important to take a moment to appreciate her before stepping into motherhood.

What has been the most impactful part of your journey in parenthood? 

The overstimulation—mentally, emotionally, and physically. The constant noise, the never-ending responsibilities, and the pressure to do it all. But what helps is reminding myself that I am not personally failing—the system is failing me. The expectations placed on moms in America are unrealistic and unsustainable.

What has brought you unexpected joy throughout this experience? 

Realizing that I am my kids’ safe space. Knowing that, in their toughest moments, their instinct is to come to me—whether it’s climbing into bed in the middle of the night or reaching for my hand. That kind of unconditional love and trust is indescribable.

What is a sentence that sums up the most impactful part of your journey? 

Parenting is both isolating and all-consuming, but through all the chaos, knowing I am my children’s safe place makes it all worth it.